Healing After Overeating: Embrace Self-Compassion for Lasting Change

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• RELATED EPISODE: Self-Compassion and Your Eating Habits
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Read the Transcript:

How to Navigate Holiday Treats at Work Without Regret

Hi there, welcome to the Eating Habits for Life Podcast. I hope you’re having a lovely week so far. Today, I want to talk about something that’s really important, especially as we come out of the holiday season, but also something that applies any time of year: self-compassion after overeating.

This episode isn’t about avoiding overeating altogether, because let’s face it, we’re human, and it happens. Instead, I want to focus on how to respond when it does happen so you can move forward without guilt or shame.

The Current Cycle You’re Stuck in

Let’s start with where you might be right now. Maybe you just came off a holiday meal or a gathering where you overate. You might be feeling frustrated or ashamed. Perhaps you’re beating yourself up, thinking things like, “Why did I eat so much?” or “I have no self-control.” You might even be questioning your progress and worrying that you’ve undone all the hard work you’ve put into creating better habits.

Sound familiar? If so, know that you’re not alone. This is such a common experience, and I want to validate how you’re feeling. At the same time, I want to help you shift away from those unhelpful thought patterns so you can feel more at peace and in control.

When you’re stuck in that cycle of guilt and frustration, it’s exhausting. It might make you feel like giving up entirely, as if one moment of overeating has somehow erased all of your progress. You might feel disconnected from yourself, trapped in self-criticism, and overwhelmed by a sense of failure.

But here’s the truth: overeating doesn’t define you. It’s a moment, not a measure of your worth or your ability to create healthier habits. Let’s unpack why you might be feeling this way and how we can start shifting your mindset.

Where Guilt and Shame Come From

The feelings of guilt and shame often come from deeply ingrained beliefs. Many of us grew up hearing all kinds of messages about food, weight, and self-control.

Maybe you were told that overeating is a failure or that your worth is tied to how well you stick to your goals. These beliefs, along with diet culture, have conditioned us to see food choices in black-and-white terms—as either “good” or “bad.”

On top of that, the holidays can bring emotional triggers. Stress, social pressures, and even joyful celebrations can lead to eating more than you intended. And that’s okay. But when we layer guilt and shame on top of it, we’re making it so much harder to recover and move forward.

The Goal with Your Eating Habits

I know what you really want is to feel at peace with your eating habits. You want to be able to acknowledge moments of overeating without beating yourself up, and you want to trust that one meal or one day doesn’t derail your progress. Most importantly, you want to respond to these moments with kindness and compassion so that you can keep moving forward.

Imagine how freeing that would feel. No more spiraling into guilt or shame. Instead, you’d have the tools to reflect on what happened, learn from it, and confidently continue on your journey.

When you approach overeating with self-compassion, you’ll feel calmer, more grounded, and more in control. Instead of fearing these moments, you’ll see them as opportunities to grow and learn.

Why Punishment and Extra Willpower Don’t Solve it

Many people, when faced with overeating, try to punish themselves. Maybe you’ve done this, too. You’ve skipped meals the next day, overexercised, or doubled down on willpower with the promise that you’ll “never let this happen again.”

Or maybe you’ve swung to the opposite extreme, thinking, “I’ve already messed up, so what’s the point?” This often leads to more overeating or abandoning your goals altogether. Both approaches leave you feeling even worse, perpetuating a cycle of guilt, frustration, and disconnection.

Neither of these approaches works because they’re rooted in self-criticism and perfectionism. Punishing yourself creates a negative emotional spiral, while giving up reinforces feelings of failure and hopelessness. Either way, you’re left feeling stuck and defeated.

These methods don’t work because they ignore the root causes of overeating and the emotions tied to it. When you respond with punishment or all-or-nothing thinking, you’re not addressing the triggers or building healthier habits.

Instead, you’re reinforcing the belief that overeating is a failure, which only keeps you stuck in the cycle.

What Breaks the Guilt and Shame Cycle with Overeating

So, what does work? I want to share a simple, compassionate process you can use whenever you overeat. It’s based on curiosity, kindness, and intentional action. Here are the steps:

Pause: Take a moment to breathe and check in with yourself. Acknowledge what happened without judgment. This step is about breaking the autopilot response of guilt or shame.

Get Curious: Ask yourself, “What was behind this?” Were you physically hungry? Or was it emotional—stress, boredom, or something else? Getting curious about the triggers helps you understand the situation better.

Practice Self-Compassion: Remind yourself that you’re human and that overeating happens to everyone. It’s not a reflection of your worth or your ability to succeed. Be kind to yourself in this moment.

Refocus: Shift your attention to your long-term goals. Remind yourself that one moment doesn’t undo your progress. Think about the next positive action you can take, like eating a balanced meal or going for a walk.

Move Forward: Take that action and keep going. Use this as an opportunity to learn and grow, not as a reason to give up.reating a balance that works for you.

Why Self-Compassion is Effective

This process works because it breaks the cycle of guilt and shame. Instead of punishing yourself, you’re responding with kindness and curiosity. This creates a positive feedback loop, making it easier to bounce back and stay on track. Over time, this approach builds resilience, self-trust, and a healthier relationship with food.

When you use this process, you’ll notice a huge shift in how you respond to overeating. Instead of spiraling, you’ll feel more grounded and in control. You’ll see these moments as normal and manageable, rather than catastrophic or dramatic.

And as you practice, you’ll start to overeat less often because guilt and shame won’t be driving your behaviors.

Skills You Will Need to Develop

To make this process work, you’ll need to develop a few key skills:

• Recognizing and interrupting self-critical thoughts.
• Practicing self-compassion, even when it feels uncomfortable or unfamiliar.
• Reflecting on triggers with curiosity rather than judgment.
• Letting go of perfectionism and focusing instead on small steps of progress.

These are skills that anyone can develop with practice, and they’ll serve you not just in moments of overeating, but in many areas of life.

I teach these skills and more during coaching together, and have you practice skills like these each week, so that you now have new habits of doing these and more. 

Results/Outcomes You Will Create

When you approach overeating with self-compassion, you’ll create a healthier relationship with food and yourself. You’ll bounce back quickly from challenging moments without derailing your progress.

Over time, you’ll build habits that support your goals and your well-being, rather than feeling trapped in cycles of guilt and shame.

With these results, you’ll feel proud, confident, and free. Free from the constant self-criticism, free from the fear of failure, and free to enjoy food and life without guilt. You’ll feel more in control of your journey, knowing that every step forward—even after a misstep—is part of your growth.

So as you move through the holidays and into the New Year, remember that self-compassion is a wonderful tool. Overeating is just an action, not a measure of your worth. By responding with kindness and curiosity, you can turn those moments into opportunities to learn, grow, and keep moving forward.

Thank you for listening today. If you found this episode helpful, I’d love for you to share it with someone who might need to hear it, too. And if you’re ready to take the next step in transforming your eating habits, don’t forget to book your free consultation. I’m here to guide you every step of the way.

Thanks so much for listening, take care and Happy New Year to you!