How to Stop Stress Eating (in 3 Easy Steps)

Eating when stressed can be so gratifying….until the guilt starts creeping in 20 minutes later, or the scale shows a higher number than last week.

It’s understandable to want to cope with stress with something pleasurable like chocolate, salty chips, or even a glass of wine. Or, even treat yourself because you had a stressful day and you’re finally able to relax.

There’s nothing wrong with treating yourself, but it’s not the best idea when something negative is the reason for the treat. Then, your brain starts forming the association between the negative emotion and the “pleasure” from the treat, the reward.

That’s how habits occur, particularly “bad” eating habits.

Going from a negative emotion like stress, to the pleasure gained from eating that chocolate, is such a a noticeable difference/reward to your brain, that it sets you up for that habit to be formed, and sometimes very quickly depending on how frequently it is occurring.

Treating yourself with an ice cream cone after an accomplishment at work will also work somewhat similarly, however planning a reward for a job well done is different than using food to cope with stress.

So today, I’m teaching you how to stop stress eating, in just 3 easy steps.

That way, when stress comes up in the future, it’s not causing you more negative emotions like guilt, shame, not liking the number on the scale, among others.

How to Stop Stress Eating (in the Moment)

First, I’m going to show you how to stop stress eating immediately, or in the moment. This will help chip away at a habit you may have already formed, or can prevent one from forming.

Then, I’ll share what you can do to really help resolve stress eating forever.

Step #1 Pause

Whenever you find yourself reaching for food, especially if it’s an unplanned food, pause. That’s all I want you to do.

Here’s why.

If you pause, that small moment creates some conscious awareness of the situation. It gives your brain a moment to disrupt the reactionary motion of reaching for the food.

Essentially, you are shifting from your “habit self” (also known as System 1, termed by Daniel Kahneman, author of “Thinking, Fast and Slow”) to your “conscious self” (also known as Daniel Kahneman’s, System 2), albeit briefly.

Your “habit self” or System 1, acts automatically, involuntarily, quickly. While your “conscious self” or System 2, acts using decision-making part of the brain that is much more calculating and deliberate.

Pausing allows you the chance to act from your “conscious self” rather than your “habit self.”

It gives you the opportunity to both make the next step actually happen, and also to take a deep breath to try to relieve the stress, It’s really a win-win.

Step #2 Ask One Question

Once you’ve paused before grabbing that handful of chips, you’ve disrupted that automaticity and can now ask yourself this one question.

Am I feeling stress in my body?

Asking yourself this allows you to become aware of the reason you’re reaching for those chips. If you answered “yes” to the question, then you know it’s stress that’s driving your action to eat the thing you’ll probably regret either immediately after or down the road.

• Related (blog post): Are You Eating Because You’re Hungry?
• GET WEEKLY TIPS: Eating Habit and Weight Loss Tips

If you answered no, then have at it, but be honest with yourself. Really check in with your body. (That’s why the question is “Am I feeling stress in my body?” rather than just “Am I feeling stress?”)

Notice if you feel any tension in your jaw, your muscles. Notice if you feel shaky or nauseous. You’ll probably have an idea of how your body physically feels when it is stressed, so look for those signs.

Once you’ve answered the question, you can move onto the next step.

Step #3 Decide

This is where the ball is in your court, which is the whole purpose of these steps. I want for you to have the opportunity to decide.

Most of the time, this results in deciding to forego the chips, due to the realization that it doesn’t align with your health or weight loss goals.

• Related (blog post): How To Conquer Your Eating And Drinking Urges
• Related (blog post): 5 Clever Ways to End Overeating

However, I also want you to know that you don’t HAVE to forego the chips even if you answered “yes” to the question above.

If you’re aware that you’re stressed, and you’re eating due to that stress, but still decide to do it, then at least you’ve made the conscious decision to act. You were in control.

Of course that means you’ll have to deal with the potentially negative consequences afterward, because the short-term pleasure from eating the unhealthy thing is just that, short-term. But you decided, rather than your “habit self” deciding for you.

How to Stop Stress Eating (Forever)

Since the act of eating while stressed is the action that results from the feeling, if you manage the feeling, the action won’t occur. Put more simply, take away the stress and you won’t do the stress eating.

Of course that’s not an easy feat. There are several ways to manage stress, which I won’t get deeply into here. However, I recommend starting with some simple deep breaths and awareness of how stress feels in your body.

Something else I recommend is once you notice the feeling of stress, discover the thoughts your brain had that led to the feeling of stress.

It’s ALWAYS your own thought(s) that leads to stress. It may seem like a person (whether it be their words, actions, facial expression, etc.) or a circumstance that leads to feeling of stress, but there is something that occurs in between.

That is your thought about that person or circumstance that then leads to the feeling.

So just think about that and next time you’re feeling stressed, try really hard to think about the thought you had about a person or circumstance, that led to the feeling of stress.

Once you see it’s your own thoughts, you can see that it’s really your brain directly causing the feeling of stress. That means, you’re in control since you have control of your own thoughts. Such an amazing thing.

Final Notes

So just to summarize, the next time you reach for the unplanned food or drink, do these 3 things:

• Pause
• Ask One Question
• Decide

If you can remember, after you pause, take a deep breath or two. This may help to de-stress a bit, which may also help deter you from the stress eating.

Of course working on ways to manage stress can help completely eliminate stress eating, but that does take time, which is why I mainly focused on how to stop stress eating more immediately.

The steps help give you that opportunity to separate that feeling of stress from the action of eating. With repetition, you’ll start doing the three steps automatically, so stress eating is no longer something that comes up for you.

Then, when you can manage the underlying stress more long-term, you’ll be on top of the world, my friend.